Criticism is the voice of “I Can’t”.

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I am so grateful…thank you all.

No one is welcome into my Invisible World.
I do not receive visitors.
Visitors are messy and might hurt me.
I am safe here. I am protected.
I live here only with my cat and dog and creatures in my garden.
 
I do not like being ‘talked to’.
I want to escape every time someone traps me into having a conversation.
“How can I get away….how can I get away?” I keep thinking.
I hold my breath and wait for it to be over.
 
Relief
It is over. I am safe again.
No one to please. No one to help.
No one to be kind to.

God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace

Change is a detox. A detox from crazy-makers in our lives, crazy-making behavior,
crazy-making jobs, crazy-making schedules. We need to simplify everything. We need
to slow down in order to examine what is really going on inside of us and our lives.
Then we can begin to experience ourselves. Then we can really feel what we are feeling,
instead of numbing out and pretending we are feeling. All of life is what we experience.
Experience comes from what we feel through our senses and in our bodies. Whatever
you don’t feel becomes trapped in the body, in our cells, in our organs, in our minds,
and in the mind/body as repressed energy. This is when disease and mental illness can
occur. As humans we don’t know how to have compassion for our pain. We just want an
easy way out. So we use the Mind to deny what we feel in our body. The Mind is very
tricky. It is the Houdini of the human experience. It can function without you feeling at
all…and you won’t even know it! It is called a hypnotic trance. We hypnotize ourselves
with words, ideas and thoughts, and shut down to what is real for us. We can even use
meditation to numb ourselves out. Then we see Universal Laws in default. We create
from our numbness instead of our aliveness.

If we do not know we are numb, then we cannot really change anything. We can think
we have changed and just be acting like we have changed. When this trapped energy in
the body has not been resolved it will sabotage you in unknowing invisible ways. Like
pulling a rabbit out of a hat. Now you see it, now you don’t! Hello! Have we met? Who
are you? Our society is so addictive and hypnotized most people don’t even know what
is real and what is not real. Even people who think they are spiritual, intelligent and
creative can be unconscious. We are influenced by external ideas of things in very subtle
ways. There is no way that consciousness looks, acts, or behaves…it is total freedom.
There are no steps to consciousness, or healing or awareness.
There are no rules…there is only

You and Your Experience.

Here are some important things to understand about Universal Laws and human
emotions, and how they work together to create reality. First off, our emotions are
energy, our thoughts are energy, and the universe is energy. What we focus on most of
the time is what we create.

But, ah, ah, wait a minute…this is tricky here…

What we feel about something is what really influences us. Not what we say or think,
what we THINK we feel. So if we do not know what we really feel, or we deny what
we feel, then we can’t use Universal Laws in deliberate conscious ways. We can think,
visualize and affirm ourselves until the cows come home…but it our emotions are not
in harmony with our thoughts…then…we’re just running after our tails.

Here is how it works:

Human experience:

Feel Feel Feel

Experience Experience Experience

Here is how the cosmic mind works:

Law of Attraction:

Our beliefs are created from emotional experiences, pleasant or unpleasant. Emotions
that are held energetically in our bodies, conscious or unconscious, attract people,
experiences and situations that reflect who we are and what we actually believe, not
what we say we believe. This Law can give us a lot of information about ourselves,
give us insight to thoughts and feelings that we are unwilling to look at from our
conscious minds. The Law of Attraction forces us to observe…just watch how you
behave, how you feel how you react…WATCH YOURSELF! Become conscious! Our
images, visualizations, affirmations and thoughts just match our deeper feelings in
order to attract what we need and want. Therefore catharsis, releasing and body work
is essential. But…

Law of Surrender:

A hard task for most of us humans. Once we go through this process of feeling, releasing,
grief, making new choices, creating new thoughts…we must let go…surrender…have
faith or we will create resistance, force, coercion. The universe doesn’t always give us
what we want in the way we want it. It will always show us what needs to be fulfilled
before we can manifest what we want.

If we do not do the work of releasing past traumas, eventually our hidden emotional
agendas will defeat us. Our judgments and control of thoughts and feelings will transform
into illness and chaos in our lives. As we go through the process of healing and creating
new realities, we will come closer to our purpose. Often we do not always know what
that is. At times we think we know, but are fooled by the universe when we are taken
in directions that we did not plan to go in. When we surrender, our inner wisdom,
guidance, faith, trust, and ability to receive takes over. Allow, accept, receive. This is
very hard to do because we are human and as humans we want to control everything.
We are not bigger than God, we need to surrender and allow God’s will to channel into
our will. Pray often, affirm your intentions to know your own personal truth which
is your purpose. If you do not receive what you are asking for then maybe you are not
aligned mentally, emotionally and spiritually, or it does not meet your highest purpose,
or you are in resistance, OR, the universe has other plans for you.

Law of Deliberate Creation:

This is a constant journey to achieve. We need all of our natural tools: visualization,
focusing, multi-sensing, imaging, affirmation dreams, visions, emotional awareness,
releasing, going within, meditation, and…allowing time to love yourself as you grieve
the part of you that is broken hearted.

Ponder this: We focus all the time. We feel all the time. We visualize all the time. We
create all the time. We are not fully conscious to what we focus on because all of our
denial and unresolved emotions. So…we run into walls. We try to hide behind smiley,
happy faces, underneath feeling truly needy and wanting to be loved…all the time! We
just can’t admit this. We are so mixed-up and create out of this mix master of thoughts
and feelings. We create intentionally some of the time when we are clear. Other times,
we struggle, then we judge. When we judge, we reject ourselves and life. When we
reject, we need to merge with others in unhealthy ways in order to feel alive. We
believe life is such a bitch. We complain and manipulate to try and get what we want.

As human beings we believe in LACK. It started a long time ago in a place called “The Garden.”
Lack is the belief that you are never enough. Usually we do not admit to the feelings
caused by lack. As humans we are taught that they are “bad” feelings. So we hide, repress
and deny these feelings deep within our subconscious.

The Truth…you cannot hide.

The world and everyone around you will consistently reflect back your beliefs to
you. That is how the universe teaches us about ourselves. There are THREE ways to
learn…

React Respond

Go Within

When you react to Life you are giving away your
power; giving away your SELF.

Then we react by trying to have “power over” through control. When you respond to
Life you own your power and take responsibility. When you react you blame either
yourself or others. When you respond you are making a choice to become aware.
This is not a simple task. Making discernment between responding, reacting, wants,
needs, beliefs, patterns of behavior, what we learn to be, who we truly are, ego, and
heart’s desire…is a process. A journey to Awakening.
We create our Reality. Life is a mirror. What you give out energetically will boomerang
back. That means: Consciously or Unconsciously. Most of the time…we are unconscious
to intentions, motivations and desires. We are on automatic pilot.
Change, growth, transformation…whatever one wants to call it, is a human experience.
It is a process of cause and effect. I think, I feel, I experience, I am. We live multidimensionally.
We have an emotional body human body, a spiritual energy body, a
thinking mind, and an unconscious mind. We are human beings only as much as we
can be human and needy for Universal Being and love. That is how we learn to love. By
being human.

That is when we become alive.

In doing our deeper soul work, each individual needs to understand their unique
family history and personal psychological dynamics that cause them to develop their
personalities. However, the personality self we have developed can limit our human
potential and squash our spiritual longing if we are wounded in childhood –

We are all wounded in some way.

To choose to become conscious to our unlimited self means our commitment to know
ourselves, intimately, through our mental, emotional, and spiritual selves. In learning
the intimate details of our lives, we can become the masters and creators of our life and
fulfill our purpose and destiny. To walk this path of conscious choice is to go through
the process of living. To live we must discern between our false self and our true self.
This is a quest. It takes wisdom, courage, and tenacity to recover our authentic selves.
And…we must grieve the loss.

This is why we cannot leap over the mountain, we must climb to the top. This is the
human way. The loss of our true self is an experience of great pain…we need to
learn compassion, self-acceptance, and non-judgment in order to heal. This grieving
process is what teaches us unconditional love…and it starts with where you are at…
it starts right now…in present time. We cannot beat ourselves into change. We cannot
“should” ourselves into change. We cannot compare ourselves into change. We cannot
rationalize ourselves into change. We cannot become like others in order to change…
we must go within…and feel, express and receive life. We need to learn to treat
ourselves with loving kindness, nurturing, persistence, patience and have great respect
for the unknown. We don’t get rid of the past through coercion, we accept our past and
let it gently move us toward healing and change.

Being deep on a spiritual path is entering into the moment of the unknown. I don’t know why many things happen in the way they do. We don’t have a blueprint to life, only a road to follow. I believe our spiritual path is very personal. Being here at this time, on this planet, is very human. Being in a body is part of the spirituality of this existence, whereas many people would like to leave the body and make it unholy. But the earth, the body is very spiritual. Things happen to us in the body that we cannot make sense out of, only respond to in the best way we can; understand and keep finding the message that evolves and heals us…sometimes we are supposed to just rest and take care of ourselves and sometimes it is to take care of others. Learning to be human is most the challenging adventure there is. Most people want to forget they are human and disregard the human experience. But around us is this beautiful earth with many types of people, cultures, races and perspectives…when we can fully accept that there is no one thing, one way, but many different ways, then maybe the human race will stop fighting each other.There are many wounds to heal on this planet…going as far back as many generations for most. We carry in our cells our ancestors pain and love. We cannot live in the past, but we cannot forget it either. Forgiveness is a process of healing…for me, life has been an emotional challenge every day…and I see that in the people I work with. Our emotions are a key to understanding who we are and what we need and want. It is a road map to our hearts and bellies. But sharing personally is an intimate experience that takes time to develop with others. I believe that knowing how to communicate from the deep places, where our hearts are vulnerable, is spirituality. Not some universal Pie in the Sky… t is very much inside of each person…and the need is always to be loved. We want to be loved not for being perfect, but for simply being.

Ask: Where did my family come from? What is their heritage?
What didn’t they feel or talk about?
How did I grow up and what beliefs did I take on from that up bringing?
What still pains me now?
What stops me from being fully vulnerable and expressive?
How does my heart hurt and love?
What do I struggle to change?

When you ask the question, see what part of you is answering. How old is he/she? What does she feel and want? Have a dialog with this part of you. Embrace the answers. Find out what it is you need to reveal to yourself and act upon…